you and yellow don’t match

I was enjoying the comfort of staying again in UP SPECA tambayan, when I first (ever!) saw you passed by FC parking lot. I was quite sure you would already be late for your class for it was already 1:17pm. But still, I could not see any hint of rush from you. In fact, it looked as if you were not minding the time then, as you took pleasure in gulping your Coke. Well yes, I was looking at you. And so did some of my orgmates. You were oblivious of it. We quickly examined your appearance and manners as you walked towards CNB. I just went pretty frenzied and defensive when a number of them uttered that you looked jologs. Nevertheless, though it somehow miffed me to admit, I must agree with them.
After a while, Marge and I, hoping to see ‘teacher’ Amy in her class, decided to go to CNB. I am not your stalker, ok?! Duh! You just wish! I was actually surprised when you were the first person I saw the moment I stepped on the second floor. I am sure you were shocked. But I did not intend to appear before you. Swear! I suppose it was just my luck (?), the same thing that happened last Tuesday.
Rej and Marge made me realize that you like yellow tops. You must have an idea how significant your favorite shirts were in all of those unforeseen encounters. Just a thought for you to ponder, and I quote Marge, “You seem to love color yellow, but color yellow does not love you.” Do you get it? And just for you to know, I hate your yellow shirts! I hate your hair! I hate your sorta humpback! I hate your macho shitness! I hate your philosophy about women and relationships! I hate your irresponsibility! I badly want to hate YOU!!! But I can’t! I simply cant! Damn it!

going back home

Graduation, contrary to what I thought, is not actually ‘the end’ of my college days. After marching on the field of Quezon Hall, I would still need to apply for my transcript of records, diploma, and other papers that will certify that I have beaten the four tedious years of being a UP student. And knowing the UP-style of the phases I have to go through just to acquire all of these, I would just have to say, “Goodluck, Ran.” Haha!
Just to pull off a part of what I am compelled to do, I went back to UP just this afternoon. And I must say that it felt like I went back home. Every step I took in the campus was magical in a sense. I was like a celebrity for excitedly greeting every person I know. If not only because of the odious weather, I could have exhibited the smile on my face the whole time. Too bad the heat was spoiling my delight. But it was nothing compared to the totality of the pleasure I have gained.
I still had to go to Eastwood after requesting for TOR, so I asked Rej to come with me to get a cab. I was not really expecting it (though I was kinda hoping for it), but while waiting under the shed, I had a glimpse of ‘him’ from afar. Oh God! Was he looking at me? I think he was. But why would I be foolish to confirm it? It already ended, Ran. Oh no! How would it end if it has not even begun? Haha! My goodness! I will not dare to make it hard for me again! Anyway…J
UP is not just a university—an academic institution. It will forever be a home where a part of me is molded. Hence, I will incessantly be grateful to UP kong mahal, pamantasang hirang.
One year. Give me just one year. I shall return, UP.

sweet distress

And so my healthy living was disrupted… Ohhh gosh!!!
It was Auie and Tricia’s 32nd monthsary yesterday. We all gathered for a small celebration last night in our new haven (yeah bhoyy! sooo excited!), where I completely lost my pledge to abide by the convention of a healthy living. Stupid me for I had countless puffs! I easily succumbed to my craving when I saw an open pack. Much worse was the fact that I took in a lot (really A LOT) of alcohol.
It was really a torture when I woke up this morning. But despite the fatal back pain (especially in the nape), terrible headache, sore throat, and zits breakout, nothing can be compared with the bonding we had last night. There could have been interference in what I am forcing myself to be conditioned to, but I will still be looking forward to more of these sessions.

getting there

I have always been told that being a student and being a professional are two different things. But I never imagined that my life will have a drastic change once I totally get outside the academic institution. I am on my own, with no one to depend on but myself alone. For I am already an adult, I must act, think, speak like an adult. Awwww! Pressure!
I miss school, I must admit. But I guess I am truly taking pleasure in what I do right now, for me to trounce this longing easily. I enjoy being challenged—being whitewashed—and being the victor in the end. I am still bugged with a number of thoughts right now. But for sure, time will help me pave my way to serenity and to success. Kudos!

Long Overdue Gratitude Expression

Out of boredom, I tried searching my name in google. Several results came out, but one item caught my attention—my name was stated in a blog entry. I was really curious so I checked it out. It was an account of a UP student who voted in the last USC elections.
When I lost in the councilor race, I admit I was demoralized. With all the efforts and sacrifices I exhausted, losing in the elections still made me think that I might not have done my best. I reflected on the idea that I perhaps, was not able to show the sincerity I got to serve UP, the country and the people in general. To me, then, UP has spoken and the students do not want me to be their USC Councilor. It took me quite a long while to accept what happened and to continue working on the responsibilities I left undone because of the campaign.
Though I can now say that I am perfectly over the idea of losing in the USC elections, reading such an online journal account nevertheless boosts my ego. The blogger voted me, and yes, he believed in my abilities. Not just that! I noticed that he remembered my whole name, while the other candidates (except for Ali) were cited using their nicknames—those that were often repeated and emphasized in the campaign. Like in my case, it was ‘Ran’—Ranelene RAN (rumbling voice) Ortinez, running (high pitch) for USC Councilor. Hahaha! I bet my spiel really left a mark. Nice!
I never had a chance to thank those people who chose me in their ballots. So even just through my own simple (and oh so late) way, I would like to express my appreciation to every individual who has supported my candidacy. Thank you so much for having faith in me, and in every one else in STAND-UP USC 07′-08′ slate! J
I am afraid that because of personal reasons, I have to be away for a while. I would need to fix my life first and regain my senses back. And when the right time comes for me to truly return to my alma mater, I am certain to have a better, stronger, and bolder me. And right then, I will try not to make my life boring again.